We celebrate birthdays each year - usually in the warming presence of family and friends. Birthdays are wonderful because they signify the precious gift of life, that moment when we entered the world for the first time unprotected by the mother's womb. Which brings to attention the fact that our mothers deserve just as much recognition on our birthdays as we do! Their willingness and struggle to bring us into the world demonstrates that our existence is one born out of both their love as well as the Creator's love (a deeply profound theological implication!). A day to celebrate life...that's what a birthday is. But what happens when the person whose life we are celebrating is no longer physically present?
That's where my thoughts currently linger because today would be dad's fiftieth birthday celebration. It would be a grand party - my grandma, mom, sisters and other family all celebrating dad's fifty years of life. I tried (or am trying) to think back to the last birthday we celebrated with dad. It would have been his thirty-seventh. I can't remember it. I can't even recall one birthday celebration we had for him. I don't know why...I wish I could remember something about at least one of them. But memories, like many things, fade with time, and I am all too aware of that reality.
My thoughts today lie with my Grandma Jean, who will be without her son on his birthday. She's one of the strongest women I've ever known, and continues to be a strong support in my life. My thoughts are with my mom, also one of the strongest women I've ever known, on this day as she will be without the man who she deeply loved. My thoughts are with my sisters with whom I sympathize because, together, we will be without our dad on his birthday. And my thoughts lie with dad as I ponder the significance and meaning of birthdays, especially as today would be his fiftieth.
So how do we celebrate a person's birthday when they're no longer with us? Should we even celebrate that person's birthday? Yes, and this is what I'm going to do today on dad's fiftieth birthday: I'm going to light a candle for him and think about the precious time I had with him; I'm going to celebrate the life he had, his accomplishments, his music, his passion for the church, his desire for strong relationships, his love for his wife and children, for his family, his excitement over "the latest electronic gadget", his inexplicable desire to be daring on a motorcycle (despite the number of accidents), the great value he placed on his family, the joy he found in seeing his kids happy, and his example as a husband and father. I'm reminded today of these things, and I'll let my mind wonder into those places where I normally keep it on a tight leash and well-guarded. Today is a day to celebrate the gift of his precious yet ever so vulnerable life.
Happy birthday, dad. You're loved and missed, and the memories of your life still give us cause to celebrate.
Joel my thoughts are with you and your family today as you celebrate your dads birthday. Although i had never met him in person i have met him through you, you are a part of him and you are who you are because of him. Joel your a great friend and amazing guy and I am glad to have the opportunity to call you a friend.
ReplyDelete-Bateman
Joel,
ReplyDeleteI just figured out how to post a comment to your blog! Hopefully I will have a page up soon too! You know who this is by the picture.
Sarah
Joel,
ReplyDeleteWe think of your dad often. I usually call your mom on his birthday, just to let her know that we miss him, too. You know your dad was as close as a blood brother to me and Uncle Lee; we loved him dearly, and still do. I remember all those things you mentioned, even the motorcycle madness :-). You will do well to follow in his footsteps - you had enough time with him to know where they lead. We love you, and are so glad you love the Lord and we will all be together someday (the day we begin the Great Dance). I can see your dad SO much in you, and look forward to seeing where God takes you in life, sharing the journey with you, and knowing we'll ALL be together forever.
Love you,
Aunt Sandi